The importance of becoming self-aware is to question the programs we have in place. The ones that play out subconsciously. The ones that we are not aware of until we introspect and become aware. The one which we did not know we did not know until we knew.
There are those who actively lie, cheat and manipulate. These are few in number by comparison to those who engage in such behaviours subconsciously. For the vast majority of people, manipulation happens unintentionally. It happens due to a lack of awareness and a lack of acceptance of responsibility for one’s own actions.
It happens when we choose to react violently or remorsefully because something has caused us upset or because we feel hurt or rejected. Indeed, our reaction is a matter of choice. Little do we know, our reactions can of themselves be manipulative. Our reactions can control other people through eliciting guilt and shame. Perhaps people will stop communicating what is wrong with the dynamic if they are too scared of what will ensue as a result of such communication.
The person that is most self-aware will be the “bigger person”- the one who chooses to step out the drama rather than perpetuate it. It is easy to follow the formula – your action caused me hurt and I reacted in a way that cause you hurt, but that is justified because you started it. It’s not about who starts it. Its about ending the vicious cycle of carrying a victim identity. We reject others because they reject us. All we want is to let them in, but they bruised our ego, so we must leave them with a wound to balance out the equation.
© 2017 Crossing Faith